--- title: Sorry, white lies and «because I said so» — a lesson of Mova's school · trees and pragmatics description: «Sorry, white lies and «because I said so»», a lesson of the adult life course of Mova's primary school, sentence by sentence with dependency trees and pragmatics. It begins: Grown-ups have a set of everyday phrases that do not always mean exactly what the words say: "We'll see", "Because I said so" --- [Mova](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/) · [this page in HTML](https://mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/school/adult-life/37-sorry-white-lies-and-because-i-said-so/) [home](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/) / [corpora](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/) / [school](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/school/) / [Adult life](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/school/adult-life/) / Sorry, white lies and «because I said… # Sorry, white lies and «because I said so» Lesson 37 of the adult life course of Mova's primary school: 18 sentences, each with its syntax tree and pragmatics. The lessons are written for Mova, and their agreed trees are part of Mova corpus 0.4 (CC BY-SA 4.0). How Mova does on its tests: [the lesson at school](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/school-run/adult-life/37-sorry-white-lies-and-because-i-said-so/). - [0](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/school/adult-life/37-sorry-white-lies-and-because-i-said-so/0/) — Grown-ups have a set of everyday phrases that do not always mean exactly what the words say: "We'll see", "Because I said so", "We must do this again soon". - [1](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/school/adult-life/37-sorry-white-lies-and-because-i-said-so/1/) — Some are polite habits, some are small kind untruths called white lies, and some are real, important feelings like sorry and proud. - [2](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/school/adult-life/37-sorry-white-lies-and-because-i-said-so/2/) — Vivid example: at Christmas in Dublin, Auntie Siobhan hands Mum a lumpy orange jumper. - [4](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/school/adult-life/37-sorry-white-lies-and-because-i-said-so/4/) — Learning to hear what a phrase really means helps you know when to wait, when to ask again later, and when a grown-up is telling you something that truly matters. - [5](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/school/adult-life/37-sorry-white-lies-and-because-i-said-so/5/) — When a grown-up says "I'm sorry, I was out of order" after a row, it is a real apology to another adult; adults argue and make up too. - [6](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/school/adult-life/37-sorry-white-lies-and-because-i-said-so/6/) — A real apology names what you did wrong and does not add "but". - [7](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/school/adult-life/37-sorry-white-lies-and-because-i-said-so/7/) — Seeing parents make up after an argument is a good thing: people can disagree and still love each other. - [8](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/school/adult-life/37-sorry-white-lies-and-because-i-said-so/8/) — A white lie is a small untruth told to protect someone's feelings, like "I love it!" about a present you don't like; it thanks the person for their kindness. - [9](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/school/adult-life/37-sorry-white-lies-and-because-i-said-so/9/) — Most people think tiny kind lies are OK, but big lies that hurt people or hide important things are not. - [10](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/school/adult-life/37-sorry-white-lies-and-because-i-said-so/10/) — "Thank you, that's so kind" is a way to be honest and kind at the same time. - [11](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/school/adult-life/37-sorry-white-lies-and-because-i-said-so/11/) — "We must do this again soon!" is a polite phrase to end a visit nicely; it is not a firm plan. - [12](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/school/adult-life/37-sorry-white-lies-and-because-i-said-so/12/) — "Because I said so" usually means the parent is too tired to explain again, or the decision is about safety or fairness and is made; a calm "Can you tell me why?" later works better than arguing. - [13](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/school/adult-life/37-sorry-white-lies-and-because-i-said-so/13/) — A parent showing your drawing to everyone at work is proud of you; parents show off their children because it makes them happy. - [14](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/school/adult-life/37-sorry-white-lies-and-because-i-said-so/14/) — "We'll see" often means "probably not, but I don't want to say no now", and sometimes it really means "I need to think". - [15](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/school/adult-life/37-sorry-white-lies-and-because-i-said-so/15/) — If a "We'll see" matters to you, ask calmly what would need to change for it to become a yes. - [16](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/school/adult-life/37-sorry-white-lies-and-because-i-said-so/16/) — "Mustn't grumble" is an old-fashioned way of saying "I'd rather not complain"; many older people hide small pains so others won't worry. - [17](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/school/adult-life/37-sorry-white-lies-and-because-i-said-so/17/) — Asking kindly, "Does it hurt?" gives an older person a chance to be honest. - [18](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/school/adult-life/37-sorry-white-lies-and-because-i-said-so/18/) — Parents feel nervous for the people they love even when only watching, then pride and relief rush in; their nerves show how much they care, not that they thought you'd fail. - ← previous: [Big feelings in big people](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/school/adult-life/36-big-feelings-in-big-people/) - next →: [Looking after yourself and a home](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/school/adult-life/38-looking-after-yourself-and-a-home/) - ↑ back to [Adult life](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/school/adult-life/)