--- title: Mr. Vinegar — English Fairy Tales · full text with trees description: Mr. Vinegar, «English Fairy Tales» by Joseph Jacobs: the whole chapter, every sentence with its dependency tree and pragmatics. It begins: Mr. and Mrs. Vinegar lived in a vinegar bottle. --- [Mova](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/) · [this page in HTML](https://mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/) [home](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/) / [corpora](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/) / [tales](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/) / [English Fairy Tales](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/) / Mr. Vinegar # Mr. Vinegar Mr. Vinegar of «English Fairy Tales» by Joseph Jacobs: the whole text, 58 sentences and 1137 words. Every sentence has its own page with its syntax tree and pragmatics, parsed by Mova itself. - [1](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/1/) — Mr. and Mrs. Vinegar lived in a vinegar bottle. - [2](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/2/) — Now, one day, when Mr. Vinegar was from home, Mrs. Vinegar, who was a very good housewife, was busily sweeping her house, when an unlucky thump of the broom brought the whole house clitter-clatter, clitter-clatter, about her ears. - [3](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/3/) — In an agony of grief she rushed forth to meet her husband. - [4](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/4/) — On seeing him she exclaimed, “Oh, Mr. Vinegar, Mr. Vinegar, we are ruined, I have knocked the house down, and it is all to pieces!” - [5](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/5/) — Mr. Vinegar then said: “My dear, let us see what can be done. - [6](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/6/) — Here is the door; I will take it on my back, and we will go forth to seek our fortune.” - [7](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/7/) — They walked all that day, and at nightfall entered a thick forest. - [8](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/8/) — They were both very, very tired, and Mr. Vinegar said: “My love, I will climb up into a tree, drag up the door, and you shall follow.” - [9](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/9/) — He accordingly did so, and they both stretched their weary limbs on the door, and fell fast asleep. - [10](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/10/) — In the middle of the night Mr. Vinegar was disturbed by the sound of voices underneath, and to his horror and dismay found that it was a band of thieves met to divide their booty. - [11](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/11/) — “Here, Jack,” said one, “here's five pounds for you; here, Bill, here's ten pounds for you; here, Bob, here's three pounds for you.” - [12](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/12/) — Mr. Vinegar could listen no longer; his terror was so great that he trembled and trembled, and shook down the door on their heads. - [13](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/13/) — Away scampered the thieves, but Mr. Vinegar dared not quit his retreat till broad daylight. - [14](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/14/) — He then scrambled out of the tree, and went to lift up the door. - [15](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/15/) — What did he see but a number of golden guineas. - [16](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/16/) — “Come down, Mrs. Vinegar,” he cried; “come down, I say; our fortune's made, our fortune's made! - [17](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/17/) — Come down, I say.” - [18](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/18/) — Mrs. Vinegar got down as fast as she could, and when she saw the money she jumped for joy. - [19](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/19/) — “Now, my dear,” said she, “I'll tell you what you shall do. - [20](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/20/) — There is a fair at the neighbouring town; you shall take these forty guineas and buy a cow. - [21](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/21/) — I can make butter and cheese, which you shall sell at market, and we shall then be able to live very comfortably.” - [22](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/22/) — Mr. Vinegar joyfully agrees, takes the money, and off he goes to the fair. - [23](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/23/) — When he arrived, he walked up and down, and at length saw a beautiful red cow. - [24](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/24/) — It was an excellent milker, and perfect in every way. - [25](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/25/) — “Oh,” thought Mr. Vinegar, “if I had but that cow, I should be the happiest, man alive.” - [26](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/26/) — So he offers the forty guineas for the cow, and the owner said that, as he was a friend, he'd oblige him. - [27](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/27/) — So the bargain was made, and he got the cow and he drove it backwards and forwards to show it. - [28](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/28/) — By-and-by he saw a man playing the bagpipes--Tweedle-dum tweedle-dee. - [29](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/29/) — The children followed him about, and he appeared to be pocketing money on all sides. - [30](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/30/) — “Well,” thought Mr. Vinegar, “if I had but that beautiful instrument I should be the happiest man alive--my fortune would be made.” - [31](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/31/) — So he went up to the man. - [32](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/32/) — “Friend,” says he, “what a beautiful instrument that is, and what a deal of money you must make.” - [33](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/33/) — “Why, yes,” said the man, “I make a great deal of money, to be sure, and it is a wonderful instrument.” - [34](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/34/) — “Oh!” cried Mr. Vinegar, “how I should like to possess it!” - [35](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/35/) — “Well,” said the man, “as you are a friend, I don't much mind parting with it; you shall have it for that red cow.” - [36](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/36/) — “Done!” said the delighted Mr. Vinegar. - [37](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/37/) — So the beautiful red cow was given for the bagpipes. - [38](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/38/) — He walked up and down with his purchase; but it was in vain he tried to play a tune, and instead of pocketing pence, the boys followed him hooting, laughing, and pelting. - [39](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/39/) — Poor Mr. Vinegar, his fingers grew very cold, and, just as he was leaving the town, he met a man with a fine thick pair of gloves. - [40](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/40/) — “Oh, my fingers are so very cold,” said Mr. Vinegar to himself. - [41](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/41/) — “Now if I had but those beautiful gloves I should be the happiest man alive.” - [42](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/42/) — He went up to the man, and said to him, “Friend, you seem to have a capital pair of gloves there.” - [43](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/43/) — “Yes, truly,” cried the man; “and my hands are as warm as possible this cold November day.” - [44](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/44/) — “Well,” said Mr. Vinegar, “I should like to have them.”. - [45](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/45/) — “What will you give?” said the man; “as you are a friend, I don't much mind letting you have them for those bagpipes.” - [46](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/46/) — “Done!” cried Mr. Vinegar. - [47](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/47/) — He put on the gloves, and felt perfectly happy as he trudged homewards. - [48](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/48/) — At last he grew very tired, when he saw a man coming towards him with a good stout stick in his hand. - [49](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/49/) — “Oh,” said Mr. Vinegar, “that I had but that stick! - [50](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/50/) — I should then be the happiest man alive.” - [51](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/51/) — He said to the man: “Friend! what a rare good stick you have got.” - [52](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/52/) — “Yes,” said the man; “I have used it for many a long mile, and a good friend it has been; but if you have a fancy for it, as you are a friend, I don't mind giving it to you for that pair of gloves.” - [53](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/53/) — Mr. Vinegar's hands were so warm, and his legs so tired, that he gladly made the exchange. - [54](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/54/) — As he drew near to the wood where he had left his wife, he heard a parrot on a tree calling out his name: “Mr. Vinegar, you foolish man, you blockhead, you simpleton; you went to the fair, and laid out all your money in buying a cow. - [55](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/55/) — Not content with that, you changed it for bagpipes, on which you could not play, and which were not worth one-tenth of the money. - [56](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/56/) — You fool, you--you had no sooner got the bagpipes than you changed them for the gloves, which were not worth one-quarter of the money; and when you had got the gloves, you changed them for a poor miserable stick; and now for your forty guineas, cow, bagpipes, and gloves, you have nothing to show but that poor miserable stick, which you might have cut in any hedge.” - [57](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/57/) — On this the bird laughed and laughed, and Mr. Vinegar, falling into a violent rage, threw the stick at its head. - [58](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/11/58/) — The stick lodged in the tree, and he returned to his wife without money, cow, bagpipes, gloves, or stick, and she instantly gave him such a sound cudgelling that she almost broke every bone in his skin. - ← previous: [How Jack Went to Seek His Fortune](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/10/) - next →: [Nix Nought Nothing](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/12/) - ↑ back to [English Fairy Tales](https://md.mova.elamur.ai/free/en/corpora/tales/pg7439/)